THOMPSON'S PROGRESSIVE DEFINITIONS

THOMPSON’S PROGRESSIVE DEFINITIONS

change [chainj]—verb

1. to make the form, nature, content, future course, etc., of (something) different from what it is or from what it would be if left alone: (The Newist saught to change everyone's spelling of Inglish werds, ther oppinyuns, ther lyfstylz and the korse of histery.)

2. to remove and replace any person, place or thing of like or approximate functionality. (The Newist supervisor fired his-or-her established, Anglo employees to change the demographic of her-or-his business to a more egalitarian, racial mix.)

—noun

3. the process of removing and replacing any person, place or thing with one of a more politically correct category. (The Newist political candidate promised “Change we can believe in.”)

fair [fa(y)r]—adjective

1. the condition or aspect of a person, place or thing that makes her/him/it desirable or equitable. (The pouty, priggish President insisted the rules were not fair.)

fairly [fa(y)r>lee]—adverb

the aspect or characteristic of an action that makes it desirable or equitable. (The Newist politician, once in office, issued an Executive Order that all living things be treated fairly, regardless how high the cost of enforcement became.)

newism [n(y)oow>ism]—noun

the practice, philosophy, or religion characterized by the need, desire or compulsion for arbitrary change, that promotes or mandates arbitrary newness, change, alteration or modification of opinion, belief, conviction, possessions or infrastructure. (The Democratic Convention was a showcase of Newism.)

Newist [n(y)oow>ist]—noun

one who adheres to the philosophy or religion of newism.(The conventionally attired person offended every Newist with whom she-or-he attempted to socialize.)

Progressive [proiv]—noun

any person, party, institution, process, statute or law that practices and forces others to practice Newism. (The Progressive Party is composed mostly of Democrats who wish to conceal their uncompromisingly liberal ways.)

progressive [proiv}—adjective

the condition or aspect that characterizes any person, party, institution, process, statute or law as fair, Newist, liberal, or promoting arbitrary change. (The union boss tried to convey a conservative image while enacting his-or-her progressive agenda.)